Written by Roxanne Oduro
There are countless articles about being single. You may be wondering why I’m adding another article into the ring.
I don’t know your personal views on singleness. Maybe you cherish the gift of singleness, or maybe you wish you could return the gift.
I’ve never been in a relationship before. My heart was recently broken by the last guy I was interested in, but I still hope I can be in a relationship one day.
This hope is not just because of my human desire to want to be close to someone. It’s also because I’ve been influenced by society, media and even the school I attend to find “the one” or my “bae” (do people still use that term?). I can’t help but ask God (okay, sometimes I yell) “When will it be my turn?”
Being single comes with a lot of pressure to find someone, settle down and start a family. It also comes with a lot of suggestions and advice – both from people who mean well and those who don’t mean so well.
Here are two popular sayings about being single that I’ll attempt to debunk and hope it gives you some encouragement.
1 “Run as fast as you can towards God, and if someone keeps up, introduce yourself.”
I used to love this quote. Used to. Like most Christian quotes, everyone started quoting it and then I got tired of hearing it. As I continue to grow in my walk with God, I’ve come to realize running towards God should not just be about finding someone else along the way. No matter our relationship status, we’re all supposed to chase after God. We don’t run towards God just so He will bless us with a significant other, we run towards Him because we love Him and we are dedicated to following Him.
And hey, if you’re a fan of this quote, that’s okay too. I’m no way am I trying to offend you or tell you that you’re wrong for loving this quote.
2 “You’ll find your other half eventually.”
There’s this quote I saw online (most likely from Pinterest) that I’d like to raise as a counter-quote:
“I’m not searching for my other half because I am not a half.”
You are not a half; you are a whole person created by God. You do not need someone else to make you complete. The reality is some people believe they need to be with someone in order to be whole. Some people think if they find someone, they won’t be lonely anymore and the gaping hole in their heart will be filled.
Only God can satisfy that gaping hole in your heart. There’s a reason why Jesus said if you drink from the water He gives, you’ll never thirst again.
If you’re still reading this, I’m glad. Maybe the reason you’ve stuck around is because you can relate to what I’m saying. As a person who has been single all her life, it is difficult at times to be content with this stage in life. As a twenty-three-year-old I’m surrounded by people who are either dating, married, engaged, or have a family.
Two things to take away from this.
One, it’s okay to want to be in a relationship with someone. However, please prioritize your relationship with your Heavenly Father first. Keep praying for that special someone to come into your life. Trust God that His timing and will for your life is better than your own plans.
Two, being single is not a disease or the worst thing ever. Contrary to popular belief, it is a gift from God. God knows how to give good gifts, so why would you reject this gift from Him?
Learn to be content with the gift of singleness. It’s not easy, but I pray you do see the beauty of singleness.